wrigley field is MILF paradise
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
