I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
