just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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