There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
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