she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
