Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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