He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
