After last night, I could never be a politician.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
two words: eviction party
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
