The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
