why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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