i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
