Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
