why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
