so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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