hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
