Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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