I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
So much Jack, so little girl.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
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