Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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