So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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