Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Green mimosas i think yes
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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