it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
