I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
