So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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