Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
