making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
