I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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