Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
false alarm, still single
Randomize
