I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
