we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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