This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
