I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize