I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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