New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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