Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
My vagina is officially offended.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
