so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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