I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
