yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
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