yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
