Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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