butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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