It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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