Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
