Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
