Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
