David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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