love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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