Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
