WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
vagina is talking i cant
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
