Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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