One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
That's intense
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
you had me at cake vodka
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
